Baker’s Dozen

05/07/16, 7-10 pm
185 East Broadway, New York, NY

1. Crack three eggs, throw them out the window; pray for rain.
2. Sprinkle one pinch of baking powder on the bridge of your elder’s nose; wipe away excess with left thumb, and laugh together bitterly about the ineffable effects of your generational gap.
3. Knead three fistfuls of store-bought dough (frozen) until your knuckles bleed a bit. Wrap in cellophane, and forget about it, in the fridge next to a wedge of cheese on the pronunciation of whose name your partner always corrects you, needlessly; reflect on how bland the relationship has become.
4. Live off air and fallen leaves, as you want to avoid the disaster recipes always invite.